lol “here’s a wad of cash for your espionage” “HEY THANKS NOW I CAN BUY THAT PURSE I WAS EYING” “okay uh u wanna be dropped off anywhere?” “just here i got friends okay bye”
WOW ROY U REALLY KNOW HOW TO TREAT WOMEN lmfao
even on his fake dates people assume he got dumped i’m pretty sure the playboy reputation is made up of A.) he’s often seen in the company of pretty ladies B.) they all leave after they give him information C.) Roy probably tries to flirt with women much older than him in order to be that “lovely charming young colonel” in the eyes of all his superior’s wives like “OH NONSENSE YOU HARDLY LOOK A DAY OVER TWENTY-FIVE” kind of silly bullshit that charms the fuck outta old ladies and maybe four year olds “wow what a pretty pink dress Elysia” and like no one else
i can picture roy mustang offering to waltz with older women because he is the young fox and a gentleman and eating dry flakey pastries and tea with general’s wives while he turns in paperwork but somehow i can’t picture him a love ‘em and leave ‘em type because exhibit A: they all leave him after he hands them money
Roy Mustang isn’t even paying for sex, he is literally paying women to tell him gossip and political secrets and then politely offers to drive them home when they are done.
HE LIKE PROBABLY KEEPS BUTTERSCOTCH IN HIS CAR.